"Xiangrou Gone!!"

I cannot begin to express how sorely disappointed I am with the news released today that effective with the commencement of the China Summer Olympic Games next month that one of my favorite delicacies is to be removed from all Beijing restaurant fare...Xiangrou. That would be "dog meat" to you and me. Doesn't just the thought of eating dog just curl your toes!! Does me.

The city's waiters and waitresses are being directed to "patiently suggest other options to diners who order dog," so said Xiong Yumei, Beijing's Vice Director of the city tourism bureau. "Yummy," as he is affectionately called by his closest personal friends, emphasized that the consumption of xiangrou, which translates somewhat freely as "fragrant meat," is eaten by some Chinese believing it to contain health-giving qualities. You couldn't prove it by me, not would I wish to put that assumption to the test. The closet I ever want to come to eating anything that has the word "dog" associated with it is the variety you burn to a crisp on the grill, slap in it in a bun and cheer on your local baseball team while wolfing it down. I've heard it stated that if one really knew what went into making your average frankfurter, one would be far better off eating the real McCoy. Some tidbits of information, in my opinion, are best left unexplored.

Were I to have the opportunity to travel to Beijing to take in the summer games, I dare say even the merest suggestion that canine was a recommended menu choice would be sufficient to put me off my feed for several days. I am just now getting comfortable with the idea that one can eat snail and not die a horrible gastric death. Were I made "King For A Day," I wouldn't recognize any country as being remotely civilized that permitted the consumption of dog meat as a menu staple. That would leave out in the cold the countries of North and South Korea, Vietnam, Thailand, Laos, and the Philippines. And I am keeping a very wary eye on France...they of the "Let's try these slimy little dudes and see what's that like!"

Some times I really wonder what drives people to experiment with things that just seem to be so obviously risky. Like the person on the Internet that posted a film of himself having his tongue slammed in a rat trap! Don't you just wonder what in the name of common sense would posses an individual to even consider such a thing in the first place? "Watch this, Bubba. I'm going to be famous!" Strange...the paramedics weren't that impressed. We may think the Chinese to be strange for eating canine, but I bet they think the same thing about some of the foods we eat. "You're going to eat that!?!? Gross!! To each his own, I suppose. Now if I could just locate the pickle relish...