"Beyond The Point Of No Return..."

There comes a time in every person's life when the tide ebbs towards the horizon, but fails to come back complete. This has become a truism for my wife's Mother.

These past dozen days have been difficult for our family. Judi's 87 year old Mother crossed an anticipated, but dreaded threshold this past Friday...she can no longer take care of herself. Since we have arrived home from our recent trip north, Judi's Mom, Francis, has been telephoning Judi...sounding as though she was on death's door and complaining that she couldn't get herself out of bed to go to the bathroom. Judi, being the dutiful and faithful daughter, would drop whatever she was engaged in and drive the 10 minutes to her condo to assist "Mother." This regular routine became more lengthy in time requirements and disruptive to our day-to-day lives. But Judi hoped (and prayed) that her Mom would begin to regain sufficient strength so that she could again manage on her own.

On Friday, Judi asked if I would accompany her, "in case I am unable to go myself some times in the future." What I found was a woman almost completely incapacitated...unable to raise herself out of bed without our help and too unsteady on her feet to remain upright even to take a few halting steps. As much as it pained me to speak what I observed to be truth, I told Judi that unless we got her Mother immediate medical attention, we would one day very soon find her deceased. Long story short, "Mother" was transported to a local hospital by ambulance, where she remained for five days and was immediately treated for dehydration and undernourishment. The poor woman was not eating any of the food prepared for her, but was subsisting on bottle after bottle of Ensure. An accompany diagnosis confirmed what I had been declaring for weeks, her dementia and Alzheimer's had advanced to the degree where she was no longer capable of caring for herself.

Yesterday Judi's Mom was admitted to a local rehabilitation center where she will remain for a minimum of two weeks, perhaps longer...then she will be transferred permanently to a skilled nursing home. It was and is the right decision. There is, however, some mixed emotions regarding this turn of events...first the relief that she is now in the caring hands of professionals who will look after her every need, but a sadness that once were far happier times can never be again. Today will mark the first time that "Mother" will not be joining us for our traditional Thanksgiving dinner.

A page has been turned. At bottom we are thankful, but understandably not joyously so. Another example of life requiring adjustments...some more trying and emotionally painful than others. She and we shall made them and persevere. One day at a time and this day I wish all who this way come embrace your loved ones and give thanks. Too soon they slip away. God bless.