"Refocusing..."

The debate for the Republican party's presidential nomination aired on Wednesday evening from California. I didn't watch it. There's only so much constant hot air and bickering that my weary psychic can tolerate in any given period of time. Besides, the newsprint and airwaves will be filled to the brim with inexhaustive analysis of each nuance of what was said, not said, meant and not meant. I have decided to give my concerns about the ultimate outcome of this most tiring and uninspiring process permission to take a break...choosing to focus instead on those things that without fail provide me with reassurance and joy...church, family and friends.

Wednesday evening's is fellowship night at the First Baptist Church of St. Petersburg, my home church for the past eighteen years, where over this time my once dark brown hair has slowly converted to silver, my waist line has expanded with the increase in membership, and where my family has cultivated dozens of acquaintances and very special dear friends. Wednesday night supper in the fellowship hall is the mid-week meal that our membership most looks forward to, as the meals are as good if not better than one could consume with relish at your better resturants, and the casual fellowship around the table is always lively and entertainningly enjoyable. Once the evening meal is consumed it's time for choir practice, in which I sing tenor with much gusto and determination if not much talent. The hour and a half is devoted to a lot of singing and an equal amount of cutting up. The atmostphere of fun is lead by our worship minister, who most certainly is profoundly gifted in his music abilities, but a laid-back sense of jockularity that makes the time pass far too quickly. I always leave church Wednesday evenings with an overriding sense of contentment and satisifaction.

At each choir practice we are presented with a front and back newletter that informs we choir members of the music we will rehearsh that evening, up-coming events, ministry concerns, and always a few humorous asides. Last evening's edition included an anouncement for a ficticious "No Excuse Sunday." It read as follows...

"In order to make it possible for everyone to attend church next week , a special emphasis is being placed on eliminating any and all excuses for missing church..."

* Cots will be placed in the vestibule for those who claim, "Sunday is my only day to sleep in."

* Eye drops will be readily available for those whose eyes are tired from watching TV too late on Saturday evening and asprin for those who stayed out too late the previous night partying.

* We will have steel helmets for those souls who still believe that the roof will cave in on them if they show up for church.

* Blankets will be furnished for those patrons who complain that the church is too cold and for those who believe it to be too warm, hand fans.

* Hearing aids are readily available for those folks who protest that the "Preacher doesn't talk loudly enough.'" Conversely, cotton balls will be distributed to those who protest that he "Talks too loud."

* Score cards will be distributed to those who wish to count the hypocrites among us. Take as many of the cards as you'd like.

* We will have a special bus to pick up family relatives so that visting those loved ones on Sunday will not be necessary.

*There will be hot TV dinners available for those who protest that they "Can't possibly attend church services and cook a noon time meal too!"

* One section of our scantuary will be adorned with real grass and trees for those individuals who claim that they best see and experience "God in nature," especially on the golf course.

* Overall the sanctuary will be decorated with Christmas poinsettias and Easter lilies to create a familiar environment for those who have never seen the church without them.

Shakesphere penned, "There's much truth in jest." We each pick and choose those things in life that we wish to devote our time, money and talents to. I and my family derive a great deal of personal satisfaction, joy and fulfillment persuing and experiencing all three through our church in order to worship and serve God by serving others. I become a little peeved with folks who would waste their time and mine trying to justify why they "Don't need church," while infering that I am. Don't offer a critque of a book until you have read it completely. If a person chooses not to invest any part of their lives to a religious practice, so be it, but justify your own decision without criticizing mine. I can't speak for all "Chrisitans," but as I understand and try to practice my Christianity, I do so by believing in and loving God with all of my being and treating and respecting others as I myself would wish to be so treated. Some Christians are better at it than others, granted. But tell me as a personal mission statement, isn't that at least among the better ways to live one's life? Works for me...

"And The Choices Become Fewer..."

Unless one has their permanent residence under an outcropping of rock, one knows that the much ballyhooed and equally anticipated Florida primary was conducted yesterday. I, my Judi and daughter Megan all performed our civic duty and voted our conscience....to the best of our abilities, given the limited choice of candidates that appeared on each of the party ballots.

Florida has a "closed primary." That is, if one is a registered Republican or Democrat, one cannot "cross over" and vote in the opposite party's primary. Independents are just out of luck and continue to be left out in the cold until the general election rolls around and they get to vote for whomever won their respective party's nomination. In other word (more so in this election cycle than perhaps ever before) the "left overs." I am a registered Democrat...representing three generations of like affiliation. However, let me make it perfectly clear that were the choice afforded me I would have without hesitation voted for "None Of The Above" on my Democratic ballot...so disgruntled and disgusted am I with the Democratic candidates that are vying for our nation's presidency. Nor am I overly enamored with the slate of candidates that the Republicans are currently embracing, none of whom being capable of doing anything remotely different than their Democratic counterparts or beneficial in advancing their own candidacy without sniping derogatively at their opposition. It's "politics as usual" and that translates into a mixture of trepidation and apathy among the electorate.

And now it's down to the front running four...with Rudy and Edwards withdrawing their Presidential aspirations today. The upcoming Super Tuesday will most likely narrow this field to the ultimate nominees for both parties. What I envision is not a clear cut candidate that rightfully deserves to take on the mantle of the most power man (woman) in the world, but the lesser of two evils. It is sad state of affairs when most of the electorate cast their votes not for a candidate of their liking, but as a protest vote against the other candidate. As far as choices go, this is among the worst reasons to make one's selection. But...it is, unfortunately, what it is.

If I were not concerned that he might shoot himself in the foot and the country in a target a little higher up on the anatomy, I would give Ron Paul serious consideration. I admire his determination to speak out on a wide range of issue that the mainstream politicians make a concerted and deliberate declaration to avoid. But I fear his unbridled enthusiasm for isolationistic conservatism fails to fully grasp the dangers of the real world in which those whom we would wish to leave us alone and let us live in peace have no desire and much zealot determination to do just the opposite.

It's a quandary...and "we the people" are left to try and make the best of it. Good luck.

"Well Worth A Look..."

I am reluctant to use the word "good" in describing anything of personal preference...too often expecting everyone else to equally share in my evaluation. The arts & croissant crowd apparently disliked this movie intensely, based on the number of critics from across the country who panned it for a myriad of reasons that, in my opinion, had very little to do with the message of the movie. Bottom line...I liked it very much and unabashedly recommend it to those people who appreciate an exploration of the indomitable human spirit.

Both Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman have been two of my favorite actors for years. I particularly liked Nicholson in Easy Rider, One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest and As Good As It Gets. As for Mr. Freeman I have yet to discover any character role in which he has not excelled, particularly enjoying Glory, Driving Miss Daisy, and The Shawshank Redemption. His distinctive voice of narration is unequal in its mellow, fatherly and comforting voice that can give credence and authoritative believability to even the most mundane of subjects. Freeman's role as God in Bruce Almighty and its sequel Evan Almighty made those films decidedly more enjoyable as light-hearted fare. Both Nicholson and Freeman thespian abilities easily excel in their latest acting venture, The Bucket List.

Without unintentionally revealing too much of the movie's underlying theme and purpose, the intended memorable lines in the film are uttered by Freeman's character, Carter Chambers, as he relays to Nicholson's character, Edward Cole, the two most important elements of living one's life: to find true joy in ones life and to share that joy with others. Brought together by fate and sharing a mutual realization that they were both terminally ill with cancer, the two forge an unlikely bond and decide that together they would set out to accomplish a list of things they deem of value before each "kicks the bucket." Their journey is not so much about the far-flung destinations in the world they visit, but about what they realize they have left behind.

I was unashamedly emotionally stirred by this movie...so much so that I intend to purchase a personal copy when it is released on DVD. Hardly an epic film like To Kill A Mockingbird or Schindler's List, but a moive of significant import that should be viewed by any person who questions the reason and purpose of their earthly existence. It is a 137 minutes of your life that could not otherwise be more wisely spent.

"Our State Of Disunion..."

It would be interesting to learn what the overall television ratings were for last evening's State of the Union address. I dare say it wasn't anything to write home about. Unless one is a political junkie, as am I, the allure of watching allegedly gown up men and women acting like spoiled children has as about as much appeal as undergoing a root canal. I dutifully tuned in just to witness once again the spectacle of our congenial elected officials embracing each other's differing ideologies with respect and mutual admiration. (Have you by now detected my deeply seated sense of sarcasm?) I don't know which has greater command of my emotions - profound disgust, profound disillusion, or profound sadness. Probably an equal mixture of all.

The American people should justifiably be outraged at the total lack of leadership that is vested in the highest seats of our government. Congress has a public approval rating that is just slightly above moldy bread and the Bush administration has only served to divide this country, delving it into a quagmire of apathetic disgust and distrust. The promised revolution of change promised by the newly emboldened Democratic party has resulted in nothing more significant than Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi instituting the switch over from plastic to paper straws in the Congressional mess hall. The pledge to eliminate earmarks hidden discreetly in committee appropriation bills have proliferated two-fold rather than decrease, the result being that our children's, children's children will be attempting to pay off these selfish examples of government wastefulness. Each political party seems hellbent to win the battle of oneupmanship that results in chocking smoke and heat, but no benefical fire. Stalemate is the state of our union...pure and simple.

One of these days, I pray, the contingent of Americans that actually give a damn about the state of our union, who care more about getting government out of our lives and out of our back pockets, who aren't looking for what government can do for them or owes them, will say "Enough!" If it were up to me I wouldn't pay another dime of income taxes to support any duly appointed government on any level that didn't restrict itself to the promotion of free enterprise without untold regulations and to provide protection to its citizens so that the American people could go about the business of what we do best...providing for ourselves and our families.

Based on the arrogant display I witnessed last night, we have a long way to go. I just pray that eventually we will get there...but I am losing hope that will eventually be the case.

"Wishing It Wasn't So..."

I have deliberately shied away from utilizing this blog to present my personal views on controversial social issues knowing that their mere introduction invokes too often heated derision rather than constructive dialogue. Still, the editorial "cartoon" at left touched a cord of remorse deep inside of me that compels me to comment.

On the most personal topic of abortion I hold the opinion that it is somewhat presumptuous of men to weight in on this subject with any degree of presumed authority when in fact the ultimate decision on whether to abstain or undergo this most invasive of procedures lies solely with the female. As much as I personally abhor abortion, I must nevertheless reluctantly concede that under the current law of the land a woman does indeed have a right to choose what she wishes to do with her own body. In my perfect world, I would wholeheartedly prefer that abortion be outlawed, believing that God-breathed life, however one wishes to define it, does begin a conception. But until the will of the people places their majority opinion in that camp, the law permitting abortion remains sadly in effect.

I am a proponent that personal rights are to be cherished and protected, permitting an individual to do whatever he or she wishes as long as it does not adversely affect the personal rights of others. Smoking, for instance. I smoke cigars. I enjoy smoking cigars. It is my right to smoke cigars, and if I choose to ignore the personal health risks, then I and I alone must suffer the consequence of exercising my free will that may or may not be the result. However, my right to smoke my cigars does not extend into the personal breathing space of other individuals who find smoking repulsive. The right thing for me to do is to understand and honor their right to be free of my cigar smoke by not subjecting them to the by-products of my habit. It is the right thing to do. It is common courtesy.

This may come as a shock to the more puritanical readers of this blog, but there are right this very minute people engaged in the act of sexual relations. More power to them. I would personally prefer that these so engaged couples are doing so within the bonds of matrimony, but I am not so naive to believe that is consistently and exclusively the case. Far too many couples couple outside of this state of bonding, as is evidenced by the recently reported increases in non-married co-habitation, teenage pregnancy, and the resulting increase in abortion. Solution? We pass a strict law that prohibits all non-married people from having sex. Right...that's going to happen...nor should it. What I am strongly urging, strongly wishing, hoping and praying for is that any female who engages in consentable sexual relations...who is exercising her personal right "to do with her body as she chooses," that she thinks first about whether her exercise in personal rights might inadvertently result in an unintended and unwanted pregnancy. My God, how much forethought does it take to assure that the pending act of passion will be free of the unwanted consequence of becoming pregnant? You don't want to have a baby? Do whatever it takes to prevent that occurrence. That's the right thing to do!

Moral issues aside, being a reasonable adult requires rational decisions. It's your body and you have a brain...use it! Unprotected sex is not only callously irresponsible and dangerous...it's stupid!!

"Aftermath..."

The pending storm I was anticipating with daughter Megan has blow its best and is now departed. There is peace and understanding once again in our family. New mutually agreed up ground rules and expectations of all parties have been established and faithfully committed to. I am sincerely pleased, but not gloating. This was never about "I win and you lose." It was always about how do we as a family to re-establish trust and understanding so that we all become winners. We did that. For that I am pleased.

I am extremely proud of the manner by which Megan stood her ground and explained her rationale for why she choose to spend a small portion of her refunded tuition fees on a trip to New York and her desires to utilize the balance of this windfall for constructive purposes. Her mother and I concur. She has become the young woman I always envisioned that she would. She is not immune from making future bad decisions...but as "a chip off the old block," who myself have made more than my fair share, she, like me, will survive and learn from what I pray will be only a few missteps. This is the mark of true maturity. That is all any parent can realistically hope and pray for in their children. Megan has learned and is learning well. I am very proud of her.

Enough said...

"I'm Counting To Ten...Slowly!"

This is not a rehashed version of "When I was her age I had to walk twenty miles to school in the snow...up hill...both ways!" But I tell you, my daughter Megan tries my patience to the point of total exasperation at times. This was one of those weekends.

Megan is now seriously dating a very nice young man, Greg, whom she met in college. Judi and I like him a very much. He appears to have a great deal on the ball and from all indications is conducting his life in a manner that centers around making sound decisions that productively affect his life both now and in the future. It appears that both are equally matched in drive and intelligence. We don't know where this relationship will eventually wind up, but daughter Megan could do far worse. At the moment they are infatuated with one another and spend unlimited time in each others company. This is certainly understandable and acceptable.

Greg's home is in Pennsylvania and this past weekend he flew to New York City to meet his family for the purpose of celebrating his up-coming birthday. He is also to interview for the possibility of accepting an appointment to the New York City Fire Department...a prospect that doesn't exactly meet with Megan's hopes for their current relationship. Megan was to remain behind, or so I thought, being unable financially to purchase the cost of a round-trip plane ticket. I learned later, from her Mother, that Megan had received a refund on this semester's college tuition. She used that windfall to purchase said ticket and off together she and Greg flew to New York. So what's the big deal?

Megan was to bring the car she is driving back to St. Petersburg so that we could get the oil changed...a task that hasn't been attended to since Megan began driving it this past summer. Instead, she parks it in the airport's long term parking lot with instructions that we were to drive from St. Petersburg to the airport and pick it up. Not a major inconvenience, but still time consuming, not to mention to expense of the gas we had to use going to and from the airport. Problem. Megan took her set of keys, but failed to mention that sometime in the past she had also taken the only other set of keys that we thought we kept at our home in case of emergency. Fortunately that set of keys she left in her home here in St. Pete, which meant Judi had to take extra time to go locate those keys. So late Saturday evening we trudge over to the airport, finally locate the car, pay the parking fee, and return home. And that's the rub... Her decision to spend her refunded tuition fee on a trip to New York is costing her Mother and me money that she should be personally responsible.

When Ms. Megan returns home tomorrow evening she and I are going to have one my infamous "Father & Daughter" discussions on where I do all of the discussing and she does all of the listening. Whatever monies she has left from her refund will be turned over to us, from which the parking lot fees and the cost to service the car will be extracted. Secondly, we will inform her that she is to remain in her St. Pete home that we purchased for her (and her best friend from high school) this past spring until such time as we can locate a new tenant to assume the monthly rent payments. Meg wishes to return to Tampa to rent a condo, because "the cost of gas is too high" to travel back and forth to Tampa each day, and has expressed to her Mother that she could just tell the previous owner that we've decided "not to keep the house." Doesn't seem to matter to her that we have a binding contract to make monthly mortgage payments...after all, "it's only money."

Overall Megan is a very responsible person, very dedicated to her studies and intern position duties with the University of South Florida's Athletic Department. But there are those times when she gives into her whims and flights of fancy without thinking through the consequences that others have to shoulder in her wake. She is not going to like to hear "Dear 'ol Dad" reading her the riot act. But it is time...past time...that she learns that Mommy & Daddy aren't going to just give in and continue to underwrite her desires to conduct her life in a carefree manner. It's time for her to suck it up and shoulder more of the at times painful responsibilities of being an adult.

There...I feel better already.